Pretty

When you have a 16-year-old and a 16-month-old, the word "pretty" can take on so many meanings. It is so easy to convince my 16-month-old that she is pretty. She looks at her self in the mirror, puts bow after bow on the top of her head and just knows that she is a knock out! "pretty" she will say, referring to herself of course. The 16-year-old; however, isn't so easy to convince. What is it about teenagers that they have to compare everything about themselves to their neighbor. Self-worth is so often based on cute shoes or shiny hair, and another person's attributes often make them feel inferior. "She's so pretty," is what the teenager always says. No matter how many times she is told she is pretty, it is easier for her to see it on someone else. I would like to tell her that this is just a teenage stage, but in reality it will never completely pass. Although the many distractions that ocurr as we age cause us to steer away from our jealous comparasons, we often tend to base the perception of ourselves on those around us. What I want to tell her is...yes, maybe that girl's hair is shinier than yours, or her shoes are cuter. Maybe the other one is taller, or skinnier, or more athletic. But, neither one is better than you. And right now, they are looking at you and thinking that your dress is prettier, or your hair is longer, or your skin is clearer, or your body is better. Right now you are both looking at each other focusing on the other ones attributes. If you can find a way to continue to do that while also realizing your own, you will have it all figured out. So while some parents want to tell their kids that they are the best or the smartest or the prettiest. I want mine to know that they are the prettiest, smartest, best kid that I know. That they have something better than each person in the room, and each person in the room has something better than them. Notice the "pretty." Notice it and then let it pass as you would a beautiful flower or nice car. Don't strive to achieve HER pretty. Embrace the "pretty" of your own.